The Trump Post

Okay, we’re one day away from the Election which makes this post less than useless but I’ve wanted to make a thing about the Trumpster for awhile now and this is my last real chance to do it before its all irrelevant. Also I made that thing about how shit Clinton is, so I figure fair is fair, right?

This election is an absurdity. Future generations will be baffled by how we had a slew of politicians to choose from — several of them legitimate and worthy contenders for the presidency — and every single side of the political spectrum managed to nominate the worst candidate they had.

And you know what really throws me for a loop? How people can look at fucking Donald Trump and think to themselves, “Yeah, this is my guy. This is the man I wanna see as the US President.”

Have you all gone insane? Did you hit your heads on your way to the voting booth? And this isn’t even a vocal minority reminiscent of the tea party, who managed to get their foot in the door when nobody really understood the crazy that they held hidden away within themselves. This is a sizeable portion of the voting bloc within this country. For christ’s sake, there are people that I personally know that support this orangutan. I have close friends who bemoan their parents and siblings and other relatives who loudly proclaim their desire to ‘MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN’ as if they actually had the first fucking notion on how they or their orange superhero could accomplish such an ethereal task.

But I need not go on so insultingly about his supporters. I have plenty of stuff to talk about concerning The Donald himself.


What the shit does this even mean? Nobody knows. Go on, find a supporter. They don’t know. They’ll vomit out Trump’s talking points of how we’re losing jobs to GYNA and our military is the laughing stock of the world and ISIS is going to break down our doorstep if we don’t do something right this instant, but its all so very insubstantial as to be insulting that I have to even talk about this.


We’ll ignore that bit about Christians because that’s a freebie and I know how bent out of shape conservatives get about the idea of handouts, and I wouldn’t wanna unnecessarily trigger anyone.

So, we’re losing an enormous amount of jobs to Mexico and other countries and China is taking advantage of us. Donald will almost always cite that one video of the air conditioner company laying off their workers to move south of the border as proof and this, and yeah, this claim has some merit to it. There are jobs that are being outsourced to other countries. You know why? Because a business, whose only interest is making as much profit as they can, is going to run their business as cheaply as possible, and if they can hire workers for slave-wages then they’re going to fucking do it. Apple’s been running sweatshops for years, this is nothing new.

So, what’s Donny’s plan? Let’s just tariff the goddamn fuck out of everything.

You think this is gonna bring jobs back to the US? Really? Do you have even the barest idea about the level of automation that is currently growing within the blue-collar sector of our economy? That most of the jobs the US has lost has been in manufacturing, which has been caused by improvement in technology and not outsourcing?

Fun fact; during the Great Depression, Herbert Hoover signed the Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act. It only made things worse.

Not to mention that tariffing the shit out of every single thing that presents a danger to internal US production violates more than just of few of our global trade agreements we have with a number of other countries. And this isn’t even taking into account the inevitable economic retaliation from said other countries, thereby initiating a trade war. But who gives a shit about Diplomacy, anyway?

So what else is involved in Trump’s economic plan? Well, dude plans to cut taxes across the board, especially for those around his own tax bracket (Implying Trump pays taxes). Not to mention he plans to cut the corporate tax from 35% to 15, which is essentially trickle-down economics on steroids.

So Trump calls for massive cuts to taxes, but for the government to remain solvent it has to recoup those losses somewhere — namely in the form of cutting government spending. Conservative fiscal policies is what the right is supposed to be all about, so what wastefulness is Trump planning to trim away?

Protip; when people talk about how common core is bad and needs to go then you know for a fact that they don’t have a clue about what common core even fucking is. Do we need to talk about why the Environmental Protection Agency is kind of important? Or that even if he nixed both of these it wouldn’t do squat to make up the deficit? Fuck, even Reagan wasn’t this stupid about tax cuts.

So what do we have next?

ISIS is the dumbest fucking talking point because it speaks to such ignorant fearmongering that I get nauseous whenever I hear someone within earshot talk about it. ISIS isn’t a threat to the US in the fucking slightest.


Yeah, Bin Laden was specifically targeting the USA because of our abominable foreign interventionist policies in the Middle East (which we haven’t learned a goddamn thing from btw). ISIS, on the other hand, is attempting to establish an actual jihadist nation within the Middle East in an attempt to fulfill some doomsday prophecy to bring about the end times. Which I will admit sounds kinda spooky, but this is the part where I tell you that they fucking suck at it.

ISIS has been steadily losing territory for a while now, to the point where I don’t even understand how it manages to be a talking point in current political debates (EXCEPT I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND BECAUSE GOD FORBID ANYBODY FORGETS 9/11 FOR ONE GODDAMN SECOND MAN EFF THOSE BROWN DESERT BASTARDS USAUSAUSA).


The United States of America has a military of world conquest proportions. I find it both laughable and terrifying that so many people don’t really comprehend how fucking massive our military strength is compared to everyone else on the face of this planet.

But out of curiosity what is Trump’s plan to take out ISIS?

Do I even have to explain how fucking retarded this is? You’re going to bomb out the Middle East and then assert claim over another sovereign nation’s oil fields? Fucking what? Who does Trump think owns the oil out there? Not to mention this plan flies in the face of the DoD’s own strategy.

And now we come to the talking point that got Trump to where he is in the first place. And it brings me such a visceral feeling of humiliation to know that there are so many other people who I call my countrymen who so fervently support this buffonish endeavor out of such obvious bigotry and racism. I will forever despise Trump for making people feel comfortable enough to express their medieval thinking instead of just keeping it to themselves and whining about political correctness at their own fucking dinner tables instead of on national television.

But hey, maybe its not about racism. The USA does have an immigration problem that we need to fix, so maybe throwing a wall over our southern border is the answer.

Except for the part where the majority of illegal immigrants are here because they’re overstaying their visas. And a wall would have to run through a 120 mile national park running along the border. And that illegal immigration is a several million-dollar business that won’t give a fuck about having to smuggle shit through a goddamn fence.

But okay, maybe that doesn’t make it all about bigotry and racism. Maybe that’s just a leftist talking point in an attempt to discredit Trump and his supporters. Political correctness stifles free speech after all.

So what do we think about Muslims?


So what else has Trump said or done in this election cycle that’s irrevocably retarded?



Fuck, every single goddamn thing about Trump is infuriating because its mired in this viscous film of ignorance and stupidity. The man is so dumb and uneducated about every single thing he opens his autistic mouth about that the understanding that people rally behind him, because he appeals to their unintelligent and rabid jingoistic bigotry, makes me wanna put a gun against my temple.

Even his way of talking pisses me off.

There’s so much more I can get into that it isn’t even funny. We haven’t talked about his idiocy regarding China, Climate Change, Black People, Women, the National Debt, and Russia.

I despise Clinton because she represents everything that’s wrong with our political system — she’s the ultimate representation of the corrupt crony-capitalist pseudo-oligarchy that we now find ourselves trapped within.

But I despise Trump because he represents everything that’s wrong with the peoplof this country. He’s the personification of what the rest of the world believes us to be at our worst; stupid, nationalistic, racist, warmongering hicks that would rather squat and take shit onto a pie than share it with anyone else.

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Why Hillary Rodham Clinton Is A Steaming Pile Of Horseshit


This is a list of Hillary Clinton’s top campaign donors throughout her career between the years of 1999 through 2016. This is all you should have to share with another reasonable human being for them to realize Clinton isn’t fit for the Presidency. There shouldn’t have to be any other issue. This is it.

The reason this should be the only issue is because of what it reveals about Hillary’s character; about how full of shit she is when she opens her mouth and says she is the enemy of Wall Street and whatever other large corporate entity that happens the topic of whatever conversation she’s attempting to wiggle her way out of.

This picture is the clearest picture of who Hillary is. Its also the only picture of who she is, because she’s a lying cunt A LYING CUNT. Allow me to extrapolate.

Current-Hillary in regards to Gay Marriage;

Past-Hillary in regards to Gay Marriage;

But hey, supporting LGBT rights would have been political suicide a few years ago, so maybe she get’s a pass. What about healthcare? In the current campaign, one of the most dividing issues is the difference between Sander’s plan to promote a single-payer system, and Hillary’s own stance on working alongside the current Affordable Care Act. To wit;

Never ever, huh, Hillary? What about that one time you said a single-payer system was inevitable? Just forgot about that, huh?

Most politicians change their positions throughout their career. Most people change their opinions throughout their life. This is good — you should always be willing to change your stance based on new, enlightening information that would give you cause to do so. The problem with Hillary is that she doesn’t change her opinion based on new info, she changes it because she’ll say whatever it is she thinks will get her the most support.

Like being a woman.

Have I mentioned that she’s a woman?

How can anyone take Hillary seriously? I don’t get it. She is representative of every negative aspect people hate about politicians. Why would anyone waste their time assuming a single word out of her mouth is even remotely truthful or not some sort of spin? You’d need to be gullible, deluded, or on the take.

Hillary’s campaign is mired in lies and cynicism and runs on the idea of ‘No We Can’t,’ — that Bernie and his supporters are ineffectual dreamers who can’t survive against the BIG BAD REPUBLICANS who subsist on the blood of newly born Middle-Class babies, so we should throw our hats in with her. At worst, she’s the lesser evil, right?

Fuck Hillary Clinton.

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I Really Wanna Make A Politics Post

With primary elections looming overhead and the presidential race winding along, the urge to vomit opinion concerning politics is just maddening. Was it like this four years ago? I don’t remember.

I also don’t really remember being this fucking scared at the potential outcome, but then again I don’t think anyone ever really expected Mittens to pull any sort of upset.

But that was then, and while the Now is potentially terrifying in the implication that someone as insane as Donald fucking Trump has an actual shot at the White House, its also really interesting to look at. On both sides of the political spectrum — the GOP doesn’t have a monopoly on “holy shit this could be really bad”.

A ton of downtime is looming in my future, so I’ll probably decide to throw some darts at the dartboard.

That was a stupid analogy. I’ll talk politics later. Get Mark in on it. It’ll be fun.

Also hi. Nice to see you after eight months.

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Where The Hell Is Mark?

Loaded question; we’ve been playing League of Legends. Quality post coming before the end of the weekend. Promise.

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Concerning The Radio

I used to listen to the radio while I was sitting in my 8x8x8 shack at work. The radio wasn’t compatible with iPods, so I figured why the hell not. Problem is that it isn’t a very good radio and didn’t pick up very many stations. One station it did pick up played mostly pop songs. This was fine. Or rather, it would have been fine if it was more than just three pop songs.

And by three I mean just one really; Uptown Funk. This station played this goddamn song at least twice every hour. It was maddening. How difficult is it to find other music?

So I stopped listening to the radio at work. I passed the night in other ways. Movies and anime, mostly. Played some Pokemon and Monster Hunter a few weeks back.

Tonight, however, I forgot my flash drive full of entertainment at home. Reddit isn’t all that active at 3:30 in the morning, and youtube will only last so long. So I figured, what the hell. I can at least amuse myself by seeing how long it takes for them to play the song.

When the static faded away we were in the middle of a commercial break. That was acceptable. As I settled back into my halfway decent chair, the commercials ended. I don’t know why I was even surprised;

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My Top Five Favorite Videogames — Number One: Final Fantasy VII

And here we come to it. I regret nothing.

When I was about eight, my household had decided in invest in a home computer. It was the shittiest little Gateway PC you ever saw, but to the miniature version of me it was the coolest thing ever. not that I ever really did much on it other than mess around with Solitaire or visit one of the only three websites I knew of.

That changed one night when my father brought home a game to stick onto it. The thing took hours to install. I thumbed through the little instruction booklet the entire time. When it was finally finished, I embarked on a fantastic journey I could never have expected.

I admit that the game hasn’t aged very well, visually. The FMVs are decent enough for something that came out in the late 90s, but good lord is the standard look of gameplay something… special.


But none of that mattered to the starry-eyed eight year old as I slowly made my way through the wide and amazing world of FFVII. I liked the goofy lego-looking character models. The combat was fun, though I’ll admit I missed some of the slightly more complex aspects at the time, the PS1-quality music was a massive influence on what I would enjoy down the road, and the story is still a work of art.

Like Timesplitters, FFVII’s spot on this list is half nostalgia. But even after all these years there’s still that bit of magic whenever I load it up. I always seem to manage to find one tiny facet that I’d missed — whether it be an item location or a piece of dialog from one of the NPCs, or even the interaction between different party members I don’t normally use.

FFVII is the game that pretty much shaped the JRPG landscape from that point on. It helped turn the Playstation into the gaming mecha that it was throughout the early 2000’s, and it spawned millions of flame wars all over internet gaming forums. And it was there for me every day I came home after a day at school.

I can still remember the day I beat it. I had been home sick that day. Instead of watching daytime talk shows I decided to try and maybe see if I could get through the last stage of the final boss. My father had yet to do it, but maybe I could. And I did.

And then I called my father and gloated like the little shit that I was.

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My Top Five Favorite Videogames — Number Two: Monster Hunter (Series)

No, I will not just pick one iteration. It’s my countdown. I do what I want.

I’ve mentioned Monster Hunter before, on more than one occasion. It’s a pretty big deal around these parts. I’ve purchased more than one gaming system solely on the basis that it’ll have a Monster Hunter title exclusive to it.

I’ve been playing this series for ten years now. I’m not going to consistently spend time doing anything for ten years unless I love doing it.

Monster Hunter has always been a very weird game to try and describe to someone. The name itself does a fairly good job of it on its own. Its a game where you hunt monsters. You’re always hunting monsters. It’s an incredibly simplistic premise, but wihtin that premise lies the complexity of it.

The most recent addition to the MH family, Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate, boasts a catalog of 98 different monsters. Ninety-eight. Granted, 23 of them are smaller fodder monsters that, admittedly, don’t mean very much, but that still leaves 75 big dudes that have hunting quests dedicated solely to them. I’ve had the game since mid-February and I still haven’t hunted a few of them. And each monster works differently from one another, meaning that there are 75 different variations of ‘Monster Hunting’.

When you realize that your choice of weapon will determine how you take on each monster, suddenly the number of fight variation increases exponentially. Tactics and playstyle will similarly shift based on what items you bring along on your hunt with you, or whether you’re going solo or with a few other buddies.

My enjoyment of this simple, unassuming game comes from the depth of it. Not the fantastic artstyle or the varied challenge of the monsters or even the awesome soundtrack. It comes from the fact that I can drop 300 hours into the game and still have so much left to do.

Also, beating up oversized dragons never really gets old.

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